People hurt us all the time. Sometimes they hurt us and don’t even know that they have, but it’s hard to say that something or someone hasn’t made you hurt. This happens in circles of friends as well, people get mad at each other and often resolution isn’t as easy as we’d like it to be. People are stubborn they aren’t likely to be the first to say they were sorry, and people get angry. They can chose to hold onto to their anger or they can chose to forgive.
Forgiveness will set you free.
What is Forgiveness?
Forgiveness is defined as “the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feeling and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well.”
If you are going to forgive make sure that you are ready because feelings can easily creep back up.
Resolution feels good.
We’re All Experiencing Similar Things
Everybody’s got some problems, so it’s wise to consider this before you go ragging on someone. Mind other people’s feelings, but also remember that everyone is human and bound to make mistakes. If you are in a fight with someone right now, consider forgiveness. It might mean that you have to back down first, but by showing forgiveness you actually work out to be the winner.
Why Forgive?
Forgiveness sets you free. You don’t have to worry about anything when you’re in a harmonious place. It’s not healthy to carry around anger. You’ll feel so much better knowing that you are okay with the people who matter to you. It takes away stress, stress which you may have been ignoring, but stress that is there.
Life is too short. We have witnessed how things can change for the worse in a moment. We never know what is going to happen or to who. Is it better to make amends? Especially if you still have care for that person.
If you don’t care for that person anymore you can wish them the best in a kind way. Not all relationships were build to last, but it’s so much better to try and work it out.
It's the worst when we are arguing with someone we care about.
Remember all the fun times you had with this person, all the good memories and the times that you were happy. Make a pros and cons list as to why you should or should not keep that person in your life. Try to look at the whole picture of the situation and not just the reason that you are mad.
We all do the wrong thing sometimes, but it doesn’t mean that we are bad people. It’s healthy to give people second chances in life. It’s one thing if you keep forgiving someone over and over for the same thing, but it is entirely different if the person has just made one mistake.
Of course, there is a scale for what is forgivable and every human has the right to decide what their scale looks like. Some people are more laid back and prefer to have harmony with others at all times. Some people get offended really easily. You decide what you can forgive because as much as this article promotes forgiveness, it also acknowledges that some things are unforgivable to some.
It is better to forgive then to hold onto negative feelings.
You don’t want to make a big deal out of nothing. It is important to pick your battles. You will know when you are really hurt and may need time away from someone. Even if they apologize, you might still require a break. Sometimes this is good, it gives you both the chance to re-think the situation. You may likely even start missing each other.
Change The Way You Think
Think of a time when you needed forgiveness from someone, remember how terrible that felt? Do you really want to put those feelings upon someone else? If someone is truly sorry you will know by how they act or how hard they try to get back into your good graces. Don’t make them suffer. Don’t avoid them or play the silent treatment. Talk to them, talk it out and figure out how you can resolve the matter. If the person is worth something to you, it will be worth it, and I bet that you feel better. Knowing that you got that off your chest and that you and your friend are okay again.
Sometimes you just have to let it go.
People do change, and they do learn from their mistakes. It’s important to give second chances in life so people can grow and develop. Nobody knows what they need to work on unless they are aware of it or someone has brought it to their attention. Remember we are all human and we all make mistakes and we all deserve forgiveness, especially if we care enough to ask for it. There is something honorable to be said about an individual who takes responsibility for their mistakes, and you have to give them credit for this because it isn’t an easy thing to do.
Have Your Say
Was there a time when someone didn’t forgive you? How did you handle it? Comment below.
