Dear Dish-it: Should I Call him?

May 31, 2010

Dear Dish-it,

There was this guy that everyone (even his best friend) said liked me for two years. And, to tell you the truth, I liked him. After those two years, I moved suddenly, and no one really knew if I was coming back the next year (not even me). I didn't come back. I'm wanting to get in touch with him because it feels like things aren't settled, but I don't know how to get in touch without asking one of my friends from my old school about it (and you know how embarrassing that could be). What should I do?

Geco

Dear Geco,

If you really want to get in touch with this guy, then go ahead and ask a friend from your old school how you should do that. But make sure it’s something that really needs to be done – rather than something you just think needs to be done.

When it comes to relationships between girls and guys, call me old fashioned, but I usually think it’s best to let the guy get in touch with you, rather than the other way around (unless, of course, it’s an emergency). Why? Well, girls and guys are very different creatures. Girls love to feel loved and wanted, and guys like to feel like they’re needed by someone and accomplishing something on their own. If you contact him, you’re not only denying yourself the feeling of being loved and wanted by someone, you’re also denying him the feeling of doing something on his own.

If it’s possible, I say the best thing to do is to move on. You’ve already moved physically from where you last lived, from your old school, friends and crush – now it’s time to move on emotionally, and try to connect with some new people who are closer to you, physically.