Dear Dish-It,
I am crushing on this boy but I don’t know if he likes me back. What should I do to find out if he likes me back?
Crushing
Dear Crushing,
Guys are funny creatures. Unlike girls, who give out clear-cut signals of interest, boys have a tendency to mix them all up. There are so many games and so many tactics they try before they will actually admit to a girl that they like her. Furthermore, the signs they give usually don't seem like signs of attraction at all! The following signs that are a dead-giveaway that he likes you:
His body speaks volumes about his feelings.
He might start talking differently around you - either acting louder in your presence to attract your attention or suddenly getting all shy and quiet. Watch him carefully when you're around. Does he move closer to you whenever he can? When you chat, does he look you right in the eye?
Actions speak louder than words.
Guys find it hard to say, straight-up, "I like you." Instead he might start treating you like one of the guys - picking on you and teasing you. It sounds bizarre but he'll do anything to get your attention. If he's got it really bad, he'll stick up for you in any situation, even if he knows you're in the wrong.
By your side.
On the other hand, he could act like a real Casanova, praising you for no apparent reason. Is he super-friendly toward you? Is he always around you during class, at recess or when you're walking home from school?
You make him nervous.
Does he get edgy when you're around? Of course, he could be a jittery kinda guy but unless you're a really scary chick, chances are he likes you and is worried about making a fool of himself when you're around. If he blushes when you talk to him he might as well be wearing a huge neon sign over his head that says, "I love you!"
You're under surveillance.
You're the favourite topic of conversation. He's talking to his friends and your friends about you. Asking questions about you, recounting times you spent together and getting up the courage to speak to you. When you are around it's a constant blitz of calls and texts to your cell and half the time he says he's called you by mistake... yeah, right! The truth is he just wants to get to know you better and probably to check out whether he's got any competition.
What to do about it?
If your crush has three or more of these symptoms, it's almost certain he really likes you. What are you going to do about it? Maybe it's time to trust your gut and take action. He will certainly be grateful if you make the first move. Crushes are very complicated! There's never any right or wrong way to go about your situation. Here are some ideas:
- Talk to his friends (especially guy friends) about him if you want to find out if he likes you or if he's asked about you. Ask them how they think he feels about you.
- Of course, the best thing to do is to tell him how you feel. You can call him, write him a letter/e-mail or have a friend tell him, but the best way is to tell him in person.
- Ask him if he would like to hang out with you and a group of friends somewhere. Show him some attention by talking to him a lot and flirting with him in a friendly easy-going way. In the end, you'll know where the two of you stand (if he likes you or not, and in what way). If it doesn't work out, then it wasn't meant to be.
So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.
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